Do you hear him knock four times

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memosfromfury:

[Submitted by: ruffledquillpens
The Human Resources office is now reopened. They apologize for the delay, there was a mountain of paperwork to finish sorting out. All those inquiring about positions should go bother them.
http://shieldhr.tumblr.com/
You have my sympathy, Ms. Sylvester]

date posted 8 months ago , with 79 notes · Reblog
Tags #nick fury #submission #Queueing is so bloody British

memosfromfury:

[Submitted by: makinganestforthehawk
Part of Avenging the Earth is helping to cut down on waste. Here at S.H.I.E.L.D. we maintain a comprehensive recycling policy. Therefore, Thor is asked to cease expressing his pleasure with anything in a glass container by smashing it on the ground and crying out, “ANOTHER!” as it makes the glass impossible to recycle.]

date posted 8 months ago , with 273 notes · Reblog
Tags #thor #Nick Fury #S.H.I.E.L.D. #The Avengers #marvel #submission #Queueing is so bloody British

memosfromfury:

[Submitted by: EatortheMighty
Because there has been some “confusion,” I apparently need to clarify a few things.
1: “Yes, sir” or “Yes, Director Fury” are acceptable responses to an order from me. “Yar, Matey” is not.
2: There are no such things as “air barnacles.” All agents should refrain from telling new recruits that they will be tasked with scraping them.
3: Mr. Stark makes sure that the rum stores for the helicarrier are well stocked, but it is not his ‘job.’ No agent should infer otherwise.
Any agent found violating these rules will be keelhauled.]

date posted 8 months ago , with 487 notes · Reblog
Tags #Iron Man #Nick Fury #S.H.I.E.L.D. #The Avengers #marvel #submission #Queueing is so bloody British

memosfromfury:

[Submitted by: thehasteur
It is the policy of S.H.I.E.L.D. and the United Nations to only serve the best and most nutritious food to our agents at all times. The meat product known as Spam falls under neither of these categories, at this time. Please do not suggest to Thor and Loki that it is the proper food for gods.]

date posted 8 months ago , with 262 notes · Reblog
Tags #thor #loki #Nick Fury #Queueing is so bloody British

date posted 9 months ago , with 24,005 notes · Reblog
Tags #Phil Coulson #Nick Fury #This is perfect #Queueing is so bloody British

date posted 9 months ago , with 629 notes · Reblog
Tags #The Avengers #Clint Barton #Loki #Nick Fury #Queueing is so bloody British

memosfromfury:

[[All S.H.I.E.L.D. agents who have actually VOLUNTEERED for Loki-minding or Deadpool-sitting will submit to an immediate psychological exam, followed by an I.Q. test. You are all either completely insane or immensely stupid. Or both.]]

date posted 9 months ago , with 601 notes · Reblog
Tags #loki #deadpool #Nick Fury #S.H.I.E.L.D. #The Avengers #marvel #Queueing is so bloody British

memosfromfury:

[Submitted by: jeremetroid
Referring to Thor’s privates as the “The Midgard Serpent” or “The Hammer of the Gods” in the S.H.I.E.L.D. locker room is distasteful and rude and will not be tolerated aboard the Helicarrier.]

date posted 9 months ago , with 303 notes · Reblog
Tags #thor #Nick Fury #S.H.I.E.L.D. #The Avengers #Queueing is so bloody British

memosfromfury:

[Submitted by: Sarah
Capt. Rogers is not ‘Mister Rogers.’ A warning; anyone who inquires about his ‘neighborhood’ will likely be regaled with a colorful history of 1940s Brooklyn and various other places that Capt. Rogers ‘got beat up.’ They will usually be forced to listen for upwards of an hour and a half.]

date posted 9 months ago , with 575 notes · Reblog
Tags #captain america #Nick Fury #S.H.I.E.L.D. #The Avengers #marvel #submission #Queueing is so bloody British

memosfromfury:

[Submitted by: Ckl
Whoever told Thor that “It’s hammer time!” was a war cry used by the ancient Vikings in his honor will be punished. Severely.]

date posted 9 months ago , with 1,031 notes · Reblog
Tags #thor #Nick Fury #S.H.I.E.L.D. #The Avengers